Dealing with Disappointment- How Can we shorten “the space between us”?

  1. Evaluate and adjust your expectations.
    1. Were my expectations unrealistic?
    2. Were my expectations unclear?
    3. Were my expectations selfish?
    4. Were my expectations temporal?
  2. Extend grace
    1. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. (Ephesians 4:32)
    2. For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. ( 6:14-15)
    3. “I am beginning to see that being KIND is often more important than being RIGHT.” (Sarah Bauer Anderson)
    4. Grace & forgiveness shorten “the space between us.”
  3. Put Your Hope in God
    1. Thus says the LORD: “Cursed is the man   Who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart turns away from the LORD. He is like a shrub in the desert, and shall not see any good come.  He shall dwell in the parched places of the wilderness, in an uninhabited salt land.  “Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” (Je 17:5–8).
    2. Now hope [in God] does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us (Romans 5:5, NKJV).
    3. The object of our disappointment tells us what we love but the magnitude of that disappointment can sometimes reveal an unhealthy desire or misplaced love, unmasking something we love or desire more than God himself.

Getting Real (Communion)

  • Jesus’ response to our disappointment
    • “When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. 34 And he said, “Where have you laid him?” They said to him, “Lord, come and see.” 35 Jesus wept.” (John 11:33-35)
    • Jesus identifies with the pain of your dis-appointment.
    • Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, 26 and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:25-26)
  • WARNING: If you allow disappointment to grow, it will lead to discouragement, which will lead to disengagement, which will lead to distancing ourselves from others, which will lead to defeat.
  • We must evaluate our expectations, extend grace, and put our hope in God.
  • God is not disappointed with you.

Additional Resources (YouVersion Bible Plans)

  • “It’s Not Over: Move Past Disappointment & Dream Again”
  • “Finding Grace in Disappointment (Lessons from Lazarus)”